A story is told of a family on a family outing that went to a restaurant. The waitress, looking at the young boy, said, "What will it be?"

The boy eagerly answered, "I'll take a hamburger, French fries, and a chocolate shake."

The mother immediately interrupted, "Oh, that's not what he wants. He'll take the roast beef, a baked potato, and a glass of milk."

Much to the surprise of mother and son, the waitress completely ignored her and again asked the boy, "And what do you want on that hamburger?"

The boy eagerly answered, "Ketchup, give me lots of ketchup."

"And what kind of shake would you like?"

"Make it chocolate."

The boy then turned to his dumbfounded parents with a big smile on his face and said, "Isn't she something. She thinks that I'm real."

Can you remember the first time you were aware that someone listened to you? It probably wasn't the first time that someone listened to me, but I can recall a time when I was seven years old. I had been hospitalized with a very high fever. During the second week of my stay in the hospital my Mom had arrived for a visit. She told me that she would visit for a while and then come back when my Dad came home from work. I told her not to wait. She could leave immediately.

Initially, my Mom felt hurt. She wasn't sure what to do. Then, she listened and heard me saying the direct opposite of what my words were saying. Acting upon this insight, she asked if it would be okay for her to stay until my Dad came from work to pick her up. I agreed readily.

Listening is an ability developed by love. When we know that we are loved, we gain the freedom to love - to go outside of ourselves. It is only when we are outside of ourselves that we are free to listen to another. When we are imprisoned within ourselves, we can't listen. We are consumed with ourselves: our feeling, our desires, and our needs. We can't help another feel real because we don't feel real ourselves.

I can usually tell when I am able to listen. It takes me a while to figure out when I am not listening. Self-absorption has seemingly an infinite supply of distractions, looking at ourselves and unaware of others. The more unaware we are, the more unaware we become.

When Jesus becomes aware of the deaf-mute in our gospel story today, he does a couple of things that catches the man's attention. He takes him away from the crowd and its distractions. He prays and touches the man's ears and tongue. He lovingly listens to the man. He goes outside of himself. He listens to God in this man.

The inability to listen to each other results in a lack of justice. We compare ourselves with others. We enter into competition with others. Our style of relating becomes adversarial. We associate with those who can help climb the ladder of success, and ignore those who, by their lowly state, might drag us down. Our whole life becomes external, and who we understand ourselves to be is based upon what we own and what we have achieved.

The truth is - I am, you are - a child of God. Prayer seems to be the only way that we can gain enough space and awareness for us to see that we are loved. It helps us to remember moments in our lives when we have been loved - when someone has listened to us.

When my Mom listened to me and responded in love, I knew that I was safe and no longer afraid of being abandoned. She was someone bigger than myself. When God listens to us and responds to us in love our defensive walls are reduced and we gain a greater freedom to not be threatened by the words of another while listening to what the person is really saying.

Then the words of Isaiah, "Thus says the Lord: Say to those whose hearts are frightened: Be strong, fear not! Here is your God, he comes with vindication; with divine recompense [God] comes to save you," will begin to take on meaning and excite us.